What is the use of something you never longed for?
Something you never lost?
What hope is there in what you’ve always had?
No, It all had to be lost to be sought,
Like a story stitched one voice at a time,
A story told at the pace of a blink and a smile,
A heart beat.
“What is integration?”
Someone once asked me.
I did not know.
Until now.
Integration is the embrace of linearity.
A patience,
No,
A love,
For creativity between two points —
Two experiences,
Two thoughts,
Two senses,
Two moments.
It’s a kind of faith in arriving,
No matter what,
As you were,
As you always are,
As you always knew yourself to be,
One being.
It’s everything they feared you would become…
It’s everything you feared you would become.
Integration is remembering,
The moments you disappeared from time,
The black outs,
The fuques of personality —
Desire, ambition, ambivalence, hatred, Revenge.
Integration is the path between the ‘you’ they created —
The one consumed by fear and shame,
The parts eternally resentful of the stigma of a name —
And the you in collaboration with love,
Arriving over and over and over again.
Integration is the pathless eternity of voices, colors, shapes and music. It is the courage to walk it.
It is the heart to learn eternity and choose linearity anyway.
To stay where you have arrived.
To stay,
Not to run away —
To stay.